❤ I love this picture of Mel and me.
This weekend was one of many firsts. Some were big first's like the first vacation without Mel. And the first time in seven years that Mel's clothes don't hang across from mine in the closet. Other first's were not such big deals but still emotional like the first time in seven years that I've had to change a light bulb. And the first time i had to replace the air filter for the air conditoner in our house.
The first's can be emotional because they represent the first of many. And the many is hard because death of a spouse is not something I thought would happen after only 7 years of marriage. But like anything I have a choice. I am choosing to stand on every word in the Bible. These words describe a loving God. A God who sees the heart of the hurting. A God who is there for the widow and the fatherless. A God who never leaves His children alone. This doesn't mean I am not hurting but it means I have hope for the future. I have hope that God can take my heart and make it whole. I have hope that God can give me the strength when I become weary. I do wish my husband was a part of my future, but since he isn't, I am not going to fear the future and the unknown, I am going to place my hope in God who knows what the future holds. Losing a spouse is incredibly devastating and it may be hard to think think good things can occur in your life again. But I have hope in God.
Ternyata kami sudah tua. Sembilan tahun berjalan sekejap saja. Semoga kami semakin kokoh dalam keimanan dan ketaqwaan padaNya. Dan kelak dikumpulkan olehNya lagi di JannahNya. Aamiin.